Dam it, My life is so busy

Ok, this whole week I alway came home at midnight because I was having fun outside. Then on friday, I came to school late and I heard that in Mrs.Carters class. People were complaining about how our teacher-student guy is suck at teaching because everyone grade are failing and that include me. My grade is a fucking B-. This is shit, It shit I told you. But then Mrs.Carters was quite because everyone are saying she a much better teacher and so she say that on monday she will be taking over the class again. and be strict on us.

It me that you miss.

Please don't define me

I'm little as you see fit.

I'll see you

when it me that you miss.

Until then, it not I

That continue to look forward.

I wrote a song

In your name and 

it begin with You.

You look so, so, so 

cute

That I become mute.

You, you know?

That I know

That you miss me and so

I'll be see you.

Should have know

I wont be coming today,

I see

the sky is blue

I cry

through you

the blue eyes.

Wondering If I ever

See you tonight

The last night that I

See the blue eyes

The sky have stars

which shining bright

but the old blue sky is gone

So will the blue eyes.

I should have know.

Be myself

I sometime wonder
What I would be
A bird, a scholar, or me
It stuck to me that I would be
Someone like you
Someone I know and want to know
I would be you but something happen
Something that block me
from knowing you
And so
I can't be you
I rather be myself

Sat-sun

I'm so tire today. I went to fremont on saturday and now I'm sick. I play mahjon with my family and it was fun. We play 5 game and I won 2. It was so fun. Then I download some music and now it sunday. I cook something to eat and now ready to go to church.

I party so hard this week that now I'm sick. I went to crab fishing on last friday.

BD party on saturday then sunday I was so tire but went to cafe and have some coffee. Monday I went to santacruz to the beach. Tuesday I went to monterey beach. wednesday I dye my friend hair. Thursday I dye my friends hair and mine. This friday I went to a bd party and just got home. Now I'm sick. TMR I have to go to monterey again. .T

im cerazy

If I know that I meet you
Then yesterday I won't be away
But today I saw you
In the end of May
What I know you know now
Till time can you me how
Have you been?
I see taht you know dkfakjflajdf
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I'm going crazy, I can't write anymore
I miss you by your touch
Now you so far away, see you then

Three petals of leaves tell our story.

One petal of leave, fall on your skin

Tell me that you're thinking of me.

Day and night without saying

That you're thinking of me.

If and only if

What I say is truth,

Which you're thinking of me

Two petals of leaves, fall on your skin

We stay like this

In a happiness world

Where you with me

and I with you.

We only together for now but it a while.

Three petals of leaves, fall on your skin

To tell we are apart.

Three petals of leaves, fall on your skin

To tell our story.

Gentle Things

To kiss your gentle petal is like

Living a dream

Far and wide beyond

The barrier of life.

Decide my fade and your

Then come together to

Celebrate this day,

Where you will be me

and I will be you.

It not that I leave you

but dream control my youth.

To kiss your gentle petal

For the last time is like dieing tonight.

I look at you and saw

Your lifeless self.

Time fly and I forgot

That you be back to let me

Kiss your gentle petal.

Suicide

After some thought, I finally understand why some teenager tried to suicide just because of love. I can understand their pain that they feeling and after one rejection. Teenagers or even adult scare of being reject again and keep themself away from people. Because of that, in the mean time they find themselves in love again and it frustrate them. Some tried to suicided to escape from the pain of love. Which mostly everyone once day will feel. Some happen sooner than other or later.

San jose

After coming back from DCON in LA today. Phuong anh asked me to drive her home and I did. On my way back to my house. I stared at the red light and something saying in my mind. Coming back to San Jose is like coming back to my life problems. San jose is like a home but also a place where I fun and also a place where it make me feel really sad.

Speak to me

Since you say nothing

It's leave me no choice

but to Kiss goodbye

To you my love.

Now you say nothing

It sadden my heart to stone

crumble into pile and blow away

by the northern wind.

Last time I saw you

You say nothing

and leave me behind

in this cold darkness of love.

Now I see you again

You look at me

and say nothing

Leaving me paralyze by your coldness.

Succumb to your own love

Die in your own love

Once day I found you

and you speak to me like before.

I care for you

Go my love and stay away

Don't come back to see me die

but only after I die

Get my body and take my soul

Bury me near your side

Let me sleep and then kiss me

Last and forever I be here

Waiting till time come back

When you forget about me

Go my love and stay away

From this distant grave of my

Don't touch me and forget me

Love someone who can be with you

but don't love a blind guy like me

When you forget about me

I will forever be gone

Go my love and stay away

Don't make my heart suffer and die

Pain live

Pain unable to express

Live with guilt in my heart

Pain suffer from darkness

Stay inside my weak heart

Kiss the pain on my lips

Force to speak

Words but no sound

Pain smile to love

Break my heart apart

Sing the pain within

Memorize the sound of beating heart

Pain seek my heart

Later kill the beat.

Unspeaking Heart

I'm sitting here right now at  6pm on wednesday evening thinking about my life. It occurred to me how much I feel lonely right now. Feel lonely for I know no one that I can look at and smile saying I love you to. It feel lonely that I know my heart has never been able to speak the truth for once. I alway put a mask behind it and never been able express my feeling. People who know me think they do understand me but I never seem to be the one they think they know. I hide behind a mask to stop from getting hurt and from the pain. Now sitting I feel lonely while listen to a song and talking to someone I like but not able to tell that person. I seem to be letting other people have what they want and me having nothing. I know from time to time my feeling will not be express until I understand my feeling or even until that person get together with someone. I feel so lonely thinking about this and love song make me sad about my life. I moved so much that I don't have someone to talk to that truly understand me and I know finding the right person is difficult and easy but the right is never near.